Happy
Anniversary!

hinge

First, I'd like to thank Hinge for providing the platform for us to connect. When I first got on Hinge, I was thinking how dumb I am and why I don't just go out and interact with human beings. Looking back, I'm glad I stayed inside and on tha phone.

When I first saw your profile, I found absolutely nothing funny on it but I did see how beautiful you were, and I couldn't let you go. Following that, I did the best thing a man could do and responded to the most beautiful picture ever, comparing you to a rat who gets flushed down a toilet.

somehow she responds

I have never really believed in a higher power but you, a lesbian, responding to my rude comment just proves there is something beyond human capability working its magic.

the first date

I was so nervous that you'd hate me because maybe I wasn't funny, or maybe I smelled bad, or maybe I have bad posture, or I'm too gassy... you get the point. It seems I did end up grossing you out when you yelled "EWW" in my face but it's okay... I guess. But but I had such a good time and we kissed like oh my glob!

The first night you came over I was still so nervous to be spending time with you and I wanted to ask you then so that I wasn't sleeping next to some random chick - but I got scared. I did ask you to date me the next day though and you totally friggin said yes, do you remember, do you remember, do you remember?

i'll wrap this up sorry

Enough talking about the past, you already know this stuff because you were, like, there. The past six months have been so great, really some of the best moments of my life. You're the funniest, prettiest, nicest, smartest (reach), just most wonderful human being and girlfriend. I'm so happy to have you in my life and I don't plan on letting you go anytime soon. I love you so much Juli and I'll love you more and more every single day.

We just saw Ringo Starr together... I think? Timing? That's so awesome and I'm glad I got to see a living livahpewl legend with you! Next we see Dave Davies, then Halloween together, then building mosaic glass lamps. Juli-freaking-anne.. the future is bright.

What I cannot fathom is just how lucky I am to have you in my life. All from some dinky dating app, like how! Not to mention!!! Not to mention how lucky you are to have me like i'm building you a website! I'm just kidding - I love you Juli.